Change Your Life: Make a Difference

Pay It Forward is a 2000 American drama film based on the novel of the same name by Catherine Ryan Hyde.

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful,

Committed people can changed the world.

Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has”

(Margaret Mead)

Don’t resign yourself to the status quo – make a difference. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the sheer numbers of serious problems that our world is facing. The falling standards in education, the rise in corporate scandals, the economic crisis in Malaysia and the world – not to mention wars, pollutions, and terrorism. How can I, one person among so many, make a difference? How can I, with my shortcomings and insecurities, possibly bring about meaningful change? While it is true that much of what happens in the world is beyond our control as individuals, our capacity to bring about change is greater than we imagine.

I can make a world of difference – if I choose to put my mind and heart to a cause, and take action.

Tal Ben-Shahar writes: In the movie Pay It Forward, a schoolteacher assigns his class the task of finding a way to bring about positive change in the world. Trevor, one of the students, decides to do three good deed for others – three acts of random kindness – and in return ask them to do three good deeds for three other people, who will be asked in return to do the same for others, and so on. If every person who has just been helped pays this help forward to three others, then within twenty-one rounds, everyone on earth would have been helped. The movie follows Trevor and shows how his acts create a positive ripple effect that touches numerous people whom he never meets in profound and meaningful ways. “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can changed the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

Make a positive difference in the world. Pay forward what has been given to you, and encourage others to do the same. You can make a difference!

Don’t resign yourself to the status quo,

Make a difference.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

 References:

1. Choose the Life You Want: 101 Ways to Create You Own Road to Happiness by Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD (New York: The Experiment, 2012)

2. Change the World: How Ordinary People Can Achieve Extraordinary Results by R.E. Quinn (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2000)

Change Your Life: Carry Yourself with Strength and Confidence

“A good stance and posture reflect a proper state of mind”

(Morihei Ueshiba)

When we walk into a room with slumped shoulders, dragging our feet, or with our head down, we communicate lack of confidence and energy. When we enter with a natural posture, with a strong stride, shoulders open and relaxed, we send a very different – and positive – message to those around us. So crucially, the way we hold our body sends a message not only to others but also to ourselves. When we walk like someone who is confident, we actually become more confident; the physical act of sitting up straight actually boosts our motivation and increases our energy; when we shake hands firmly, we become assertive.

Assuming the posture of how we would be if we were more assertive and energized in fact boosts our confidence and invigorates us. Our behaviour changes our attitude. Sit up straight. Walk confidently. Carry yourself in a way that communicates to the world – and to yourself – strength and confidence.

Don’t neglect your posture,

Carry yourself with strength and confidence.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

 References:

1. Choose the Life You Want: 101 Ways to Create You Own Road to Happiness by Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD (New York: The Experiment, 2012)

2. The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field by N. Branden (New York: Bantam, 1994).

Change Your Life: Think and Act Purposefully

“Rumination inevitably backfires. It merely compounds our misery.

It’s a heroic attempt to solve a problem that it is just not capable of solving”

(Mark Williams)

We often ruminate about a problem we face, obsessively playing and replaying the scenario in our mind. We tend to believe that rumination will help us overcome discomfort or unhappiness, but in fact replaying the scenario over and over in our mind usually makes things worse. In the words of psychologist Mark Williams and his colleagues, “Rumination is part of the problem, not part of the solution.” On the other hand, purposeful thinking – whether through writing in a journal or verbalizing our thoughts – is a much better way of dealing with psychological and emotional challenges. Purposeful action – actually doing something that could make us feel better – is a lot more helpful than allowing chaotic and usually very negative thinking to wreak havoc on our emotions.

Do this: Instead of focusing on the helplessness of your situation, which gets you nowhere, you could choose to engage in an activity that will help you feel better as well as perform better. Begin by creating a personal blog or/and writing your thoughts and feelings about the situation. Writing will help you feel better, and the clarity you reach will help you commit to taking concrete steps toward meeting the challenges you face today.

Don’t obsessively replay a scenario,

Think and act purposefully.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

 References:

1. Choose the Life You Want: 101 Ways to Create You Own Road to Happiness by Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD (New York: The Experiment, 2012)

2. The Mindful Way Through Depression: Feeling Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness by J.M.G. Williams (New York: The Guilford Press, 2007).

Change Your Life: Be Mindful of the Wonder

“Those who dwell among the beauties and mysteries of the earth
are never alone or weary of life” (Rachel Carson).

What we see in the world around us is to a large extent a matter of choice. Do we take time every day to look, really look, at things? To find the beauty, or the humour, or the charm, or the mystery in them? When driving car to work or better at traffic light, do we stare aimlessly out the window, or do we make an effort to look at the colour of the sky, the shapes of the clouds? Do we look closely enough to allow ourselves to be delighted by the funny little dog trotting along the sidewalk? Or to feel sympathy, or admiration, or sadness when we watch an elderly woman walking slowly and carefully out her front door?

It is natural to be preoccupied by our own thoughts, or to be lulled into not noticing all that is around us while we do routine errands. And there is nothing wrong in daydreaming from time to time (in fact is it good). But the more we can be mindful of what we are doing as we doing it, the healthier and happier we will be.

Mindfulness is a choice, and it is something we can practice: When our mind wanders – whether while eating, doing the dishes, writing a report, or walking to our car – we can gently shift our focus back to the wonders that are everywhere to be found.

I like what Helen Keller (she lost her sight and hearing when she was 19 months old as a result of an illness) noted in her essay, Three Days to See:

“I who am blind can give one hint to those who see – one admonition to those who would make full use of the gift of sight: Use your eyes as if tomorrow you would be stricken blind… Hear the music of voices, the song of the bird, the mighty strains of an orchestra, as if you would be stricken deaf tomorrow. Touch each object you want to touch as if tomorrow your tactile sense would fail. Smell the perfume of flowers, taste with relish each morsel, as if tomorrow you could never smell and taste again. Make the most of every sense: glory in all the facets of pleasure and beauty which the world reveals to you.”

Don’t overlook life’s treasures,

Be mindful of the wonder.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

 References:

1. Choose the Life You Want: 101 Ways to Create You Own Road to Happiness by Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD (New York: The Experiment, 2012)

2. Full Catastrophe Living” Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain and Illness by J. Kabat-Zinn (New York: Delta, 1990)

Change Your Life: Choose to Choose

Don't just go with the flow in choosing college: What's your interest?
What's your dream? What's suit your talent and passion? Choose to choose.

“Understand that the right to choose your own path is a sacred privilege.
Use it. Dwell in possibilities” (Oprah Winfrey)

Lately I’ve noticed that a lot of conversation about dealing with the stresses of modern life seem to conclude with someone advising that we should all stop worrying so much and trying so hard, that we should go with the flow and “just live our life.” Sometimes this is good advice, as many things are beyond our control and worrying about them will not make any difference. And we can often be so focused on the future that we miss out on all there is to enjoy in the present moment. But this advice has a serious downside: “Just live your life” can lead us to turn our back on our most sacred privilege, our ability to choose our own path. In the guise of freeing us from stress and struggle, “just live your life” can actually have the sinister effect of preventing us from making the most of our life.

When the injunction to just live our life becomes a license not to choose, we end up being pulled along by other’s choices, simply behaving the way we always have in the past, passively reacting to life rather than actively creating the life that we really want to be living. To make the most of our life, we must first of all choose to choose – this is the fundamental choice underlying all other choices. We must commit ourselves to the idea that there are far more possibilities than we normally see, and then to the effort that it takes to examine these possibilities and choose the one that is best for us.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

 References:

1. Choose the Life You Want: 101 Ways to Create You Own Road to Happiness by Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD (New York: The Experiment, 2012)

2. Think! Why Crucial Decisions Can’t Be Made in the Blink of an Eye by R. M. LeGault (New York: Threhold Editions, 2006)