12 Rules for Life #12 Pat a Cat When You Encounter One on the Street (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“Set aside some time to talk and to think about the illness or other crisis and how it should be managed every day. Do not talk or think about it otherwise. If you do not limit its effect, you will become exhausted, and everything will spiral into the ground. This is not helpful. Conserve your strength. You’re in a war, not a battle, and a war is composed of many battles. You must stay functional through all of them. When worries associated with the crisis arise at other times, remind yourself that you will think them through, during the scheduled period”

(Jordan Peterson)

This final rule is mainly autobiographical and Peterson tells us about tragedy and pain. When tragic things are in front of us and we’re powerless, we must keep our eyes open for those little things that make life worthwhile. The title of this chapter inspired from the author’s experience of observing a local stray cat and watching it adapt to its surroundings in a harsh environment. “

When you feel that your life is crewed up there is a way to make it easier to handle until you make it back on your feet. That is to shorten your “temporal horizon.” Stop thinking about what’s going to happen in the next months. Think about what and how you can improve today’s day or maybe just the next hours. Shrink the time frame until you can eventually handle the rest of it and this is how you adjust to devastation. It’s very important to not give up even in the worst situations, even if you’re at a place you’d rather not be, always try to look for what’s meaningful and worthwhile. “When you are going for a walk and your head is spinning a cat will show up and if you pay attention to it then you will get a reminder for just fifteen seconds that the wonder of Being might make up for the ineradicable suffering that accompanies it,” wrote Peterson, “Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street.”

Keep Your Eyes on What’s Meaningful and Worthwhile.

12 Rules for Life #11 Don't Bother Children When They Are Skateboarding (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“If you think tough men are dangerous, wait until you see what weak men are capable of”

(Jordan Peterson)

This rule is essentially about masculinity (you might not agree with me). Peterson tells us that when children do all kinds of this crazy stuff on skateboards and handrails (or in Malaysia, play in the rain or at the playground or outside the house yard), we should let them be. Of course, it might be dangerous but it’s important for them to develop masculinity, competence, take risk and face danger. Normally, a lot of rebellious behavior in school is called “toxic masculinity” but Peterson believes that the benefits are bigger than the probably problematic situations.

When people are untrammeled and feel encouraged, they prefer to live in the edge. By living this way, they can be confident in their experience and confront chaos that helps them develop and grow. They’re made for that reason, to enjoy risk (some of them more than others). Besides, if they are overprotected, they will fail when something dangerous or unexpected will suddenly occur, which inevitably will happen sometime – eventually. So why not let them develop toughness? 

Let them Play... Dangerously

12 Rules for Life #10 Be Precise In Your Speech (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“To be precise in your speech does two things...
it specifies your goal and it reduces uncertainty.”

(Jordan Peterson)

According to Peterson, there is an undivided connection between communication and reality. Language takes what’s unknown from chaos and gives it a name making it into a thing. Once that thing is addressed with a name then you can control it. A simple example would be the feeling of touch. Imagine that you see a pot in front of you for the first time. Without touching it you don’t know what’s wrong with it. Once you touch it you feel it’s too hot to hold it for too long. So, you give it a “name” – a hot pot. Now you can do something about it and use a pair of heatproof gloves to do your job.

On the other hand, the unnameable is terrifying, at least much more than the nameable. As an example, the movie The Ring didn’t describe and name the evil at all. Objectively speaking, in this movie the scary scenes are very few in number in comparison with other horror thrillers. It’s all about the unnameable. If you can’t name something then that makes it more terrifying to you. It also makes you feel weaker against it if you don’t actually know what it is. That’s why, according to Peterson, precise speech is important. I can bring things out of the realm of unspeakable. Words are not to be underestimated as they have a creative power. Don’t create more mark and darkness by imprecise speech!

Be Precise… Exercise, Practice… then Speak

12 Rules for Life #9 Assume that the Person You are Listening to Might Know Something You Don't (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“The great majority of us could not listen; we would find ourselves compelled to evaluate because listening would seem too dangerous. So the first requirement is courage, and we do not always have it.”

(Carl Rogers)

When people argue about something, they often fall in the trap of trying to win over that argument and miss the true point of a good conversation. That is to come-out-wiser-than-you mentality when into it. First of all, winning over an argument does not necessarily mean that your thinking was smarter. If you happen to be more verbally fluent than the others, chances are against him even though he might be wiser than you, because as long as he cannot express his opinions with ease he can’t win because you don’t give him fair chances to win. And as mentioned before: “It’s not about winning.”

The best thing to do is to take a good advantage of what someone is trying to tell you. Give him or her a chance to fully explain and make you understand what he or she is exactly thinking. Who knows maybe, in the end, you could find his or her ideas or suggestions better than some of yours and prevent you from facing future problems. “If you listen, instead, without premature judgment, people will generally tell you everything they are thinking—and with very little deceit. People will tell you the most amazing, absurd, interesting things.” Peterson even says to “listen to your enemies.” Surely, they will lie about you, but also be sure that they will be frank about things that your friends might not see or don’t dare to tell you. Learn to separate the wheat from the chaff.

Beyoncé sang, “Listen!”

12 Rules for Life #8 Tell the Truth - Or, At Least, Don't Lie (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“If your life is not what it could be, try telling the truth. If you cling desperately to an ideology, or wallow in nihilism, try telling the truth. If you feel weak and rejected, and desperate, and confused, try telling the truth. In Paradise, everyone speaks the truth. That is what makes it Paradise. Tell the truth. Or, at least, don’t lie.”

“To tell the truth is to bring the most habitable reality into Being. Truth builds edifices that can stand a thousand years. Truth feeds and clothes the poor, and makes nations wealthy and safe. Truth reduces the terrible complexity of a man to the simplicity of his word, so that he can become a partner rather than an enemy. Truth makes the past truly past, and makes the best use of the future's possibilities. Truth is the ultimate, inexhaustible natural resource. It's the light in the darkness. See the truth. Tell the truth.”

(Jordan Peterson)

One of the hardest things to do sometimes is telling the truth. Truth can be harsh and there are also times difficult to sense it. However, it’s very easy for us to know when we are lying. Consequent, when we don’t know the truth or we find it hard to tell it, then the next best option we have it to simply not to lie. Truth is very important in our lives as it is associated with meaning, according to Peterson. Only truth can bring you out of trouble, maybe not immediately sometimes, but in the long run, you’ll have everyone’s trust. There will be cases that you won’t know what to do but remember this: Start by just telling the truth! It will make it easier to face any situation.

On the other hand, lying makes you weak. Most of the times, the moment you lie you start immediately feeling strange, weak and insecure. The others can sense it too and start doubting you. Even if they happen to not be able to prove you wrong, you still are not satisfied because you know you’re lying and you’re fake. Lying is “the antithesis of meaning and reality.” The only thing you could achieve by lying is only get away from a situation, but only temporarily. As Peterson says: “It was the great and the small lies of the Nazi and Communist states that produced the deaths of millions of people.”

Tell The Truth – Or At Least, Don’t Lie