12 Rules for Life #9 Assume that the Person You are Listening to Might Know Something You Don't (Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos (2018) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“The great majority of us could not listen; we would find ourselves compelled to evaluate because listening would seem too dangerous. So the first requirement is courage, and we do not always have it.”

(Carl Rogers)

When people argue about something, they often fall in the trap of trying to win over that argument and miss the true point of a good conversation. That is to come-out-wiser-than-you mentality when into it. First of all, winning over an argument does not necessarily mean that your thinking was smarter. If you happen to be more verbally fluent than the others, chances are against him even though he might be wiser than you, because as long as he cannot express his opinions with ease he can’t win because you don’t give him fair chances to win. And as mentioned before: “It’s not about winning.”

The best thing to do is to take a good advantage of what someone is trying to tell you. Give him or her a chance to fully explain and make you understand what he or she is exactly thinking. Who knows maybe, in the end, you could find his or her ideas or suggestions better than some of yours and prevent you from facing future problems. “If you listen, instead, without premature judgment, people will generally tell you everything they are thinking—and with very little deceit. People will tell you the most amazing, absurd, interesting things.” Peterson even says to “listen to your enemies.” Surely, they will lie about you, but also be sure that they will be frank about things that your friends might not see or don’t dare to tell you. Learn to separate the wheat from the chaff.

Beyoncé sang, “Listen!”

Nurture Creativity: Hang Out in a Cemetery!

“Creativity comes from looking for the unexpected

and stepping outside your own experience”

(Masaru Ibuka)

By forcing yourself to go to places that may be outside your comfort zone or out of the ordinary, you not only find out new things or ideas, gain more experience and meet new people, but also it will let your creative juices flow with inspirations and refreshment. Let’s face it, even the most creative people go through a dry season once in a while. We all need to replenish the well of our inspirations. Here are some suggestions where you might want to try. Refill your creative well, get out and explore!

#1: Go to Waterfront and Watch Buskers Performing

Busking or street performance is the practice of performing in public places. Whether music, dance, art or theatre, these show have creativity written all over them. During a live band performance, for example, it's all about the performers, audience and the energy they created. Presentation skills, music skills, communication skills are all in one show. These are creative people. Be inspired and let your creativity nurtured by what you just saw and heard. Sometimes all it takes to get the creative juices flowing is to enjoy another art form. Hey, go to places to see buskers perform in town. You might be surprised how inspiring it can be.  

#2: Visit Sarawak Museum or Art Gallery

When was the last time you visit a museum? I assume in average – once in a life time. Unless you work in the museum or art gallery, you’re not quite likely to spending time there. Don’t worry, I understand. But even if you think you’re someone who just doesn’t enjoy museum or art exposure, you might want to ‘force’ yourself to do it at least once per year. You may be surprised and find that you actually enjoyed it. Extinct animals, ancient weapons and music instruments, mini model of longhouses, drawing and crafting by our local artists, masks for performing rituals, crafts design. Look at the old sampan (boat) design, for example, let your creativity take over and think about what does the craft or symbols means, why it was created the way it was. Ah, inspirations!

#3: Hang Out In a Cemetery

This probably my most uncomfortable place to visit. Admittedly, it may seem like an odd place to get your creativity flowing but I assure you, if you just let the scene stay in your mind, you can be inspired even by the tomb and grave. When I sat there and remembered my friend talked about how expensive coffin is, and how we spend lots of money to buy a beautiful and luxury coffin just to put it seven feet on the ground the next day, it doesn’t make sense! Then suddenly an idea came to my mind that may solve this issue of over-spending – recycle the coffin. Use it externally, but change it to plain, simple and inexpensive coffin for burial. Crazy? Idea is an idea after all.

Maybe you can try to image what their lives was. Pull out that pen and paper and start creatively writing their life stories. Where were they born, who did they marry, what did they do for a living, and how many kids did they have? Get as creative as you want. The idea here is to let the creativity flow and have fun with it.

#4: Get Back to the Nature

Many people find that simply taking a walk in a park or jog along a wooded trail is just what they need to refill the well of inspiration. I do this almost every day. Simply getting out in the fresh air and away from the computer and smart phone and external noises can cause you to relax and replenish your soul. If I feel a little less creative, or struggle to solve a problem or want to stop thinking about it for a while, I just get back to the nature.  Get out in the world and away from your day-to-day tasks for a bit, and you’ll soon find that those creative juices will gracefully flowing again.

Force yourself to go to places that may be outside your comfort zone.

Maybe, hang out in the cemetery? 

Wherever you can replenish your well of inspirations my friend.

God, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

Characteristics of Creative Person

Conan O’Brien expresses himself for Fast Company’s Most Creative People issue (June 2011). 

This is funny!

Creative people are idealistic, energetic, confident, independent, thorough, adventurous, child-like, possesses a sense of humour, are perseverance and spontaneous and are risk-takers. Do you possess any one (or more) of these characteristic? If you do, then you are a creative person.

Creative people are independent thinkers. They can work by themselves and are not afraid of what people may say. They transcend accepted patterns of thinking. They do not conform to rules and regulations that restrict their freedom to think and act. They do not follow the crowd. People who are creative are full of energy. They possess a certain characteristic zest and a habit for spontaneous action. Creativity requires energy. Energetic people have the power and stamina to create new ideas, new things and new journeys.

Creative people are more likely to engage in adventurous and stimulating acts such as kayaking, mountain climbing, going places in rural areas or working overseas. They trod the unbeaten path. They have a strong curiosity and urge to understand the world around them and to try almost everything. Hence their wide interests and unusual hobbies. A sense of self-confidence is central to creativity. One cannot create if one is not confident of one’s abilities and capabilities. Self-confidence is not only inborn but it may also be developed through experience and exercise.

People who are creative are also playful and child-like. They have no prejudices and are not tainted by adult notions of what is proper and not proper. They are still full of wonder and are not afraid of criticism and comment. They are not bound by convention. Creative people are non-conformists to some extent. A sense of humour is another attribute of creative people. Humour may lead to great discoveries, invention and artistic creation. A fanciful, playful and excitable state of mind is an important feature of creative thinking and creative thinkers. Developing the ability to see the humorous side of life is a prerequisite to creativity.

A strong sense of perseverance, persistence and unwillingness to give up is another characteristic of creative people. They do not give up so easily or so readily. They will try again and again. Each failure is viewed as a learning experience. Creative people also risk-takers. Risk is everywhere. We take risk while driving to work, while playing games and when giving an opinion. If we do not try out new ideas and take risk, how do we know it will work or not? The greatest failure is not to attempt a new idea at all. The world’s greatest inventors, discoverers and pioneers are all risk-takers. Because they have independent mind and high-confidence in themselves, they are more willing to take creative risk than the average person. They dare to differ, to make changes and to deviate from the usual.

Are the characteristics enumerated above innate or are they acquired? The answer is – both. We are born with creative characteristics and we can learn to be creative too. Creative abilities exist in varying degrees in everyone of us. It is a matter of getting these abilities to surface and make them work for you. Creativity is within every one of us. It not the exclusive possession of a select few*.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

*These characteristic are taken from Leo Ann Mean’s On Creativity: Awaken the Creative Mind (Chapter 2: Creative Person). Use and modified without permission. That’s what creative people do.