Secret of the Millionaire Mind: Wealth File #9 Rich People are Bigger than Their Problems

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by T. Harv Eker’s Secret of the Millionaire Mind: Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth (2005) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

Wealth File #9:

Rich People are Bigger than Their Problems.

Poor People* are Smaller than Their Problems.

The size of the problem is never the issue, what matters is the size of you! Harv Eker said, “If you have a big problem in your life, all that means is that you are being a small person!” Either you are whining about the problem or you are working on the solution. This is straight to the point: It’s all about you! Whatever happens in your life, be it good or bad, interesting or boring, tough or easy, what matters is how you get affected by it. What matters is you! There are no problems, there are only situations. We then make them a problem. Respectively, some people make it a problem, others don’t even get affected or realize it. How can that be?

Good question, right? How can it be that the exact same situation is a problem for one but not for another? It depends on the person, you may say – and you’re right. It depends on you. I remember when I went to work from KL Central to Times Square. Monorail KL would take people every five minutes or so. At times, these trains were crazily crowded (especially on weekends). You see in the faces of people how they felt about the situation. And interestingly, some people got negatively affected by the crowded train EVERY SINGLE DAY. Why? Are you that small of a person that a crowded train is a problem for you? And even if it is (e.g. due to claustrophobia, fear of being in closed/crowded places), you do have other options such as go earlier, go by bus or bike, use a taxi or Grab, or walk…

Do you see my point? You can either whine about the situation (make it a problem) or work on the solution. Eker says it over and over again, “What matters is the size of you.” The more you work on yourself, the fewer the problems there will be – you’ll be bigger than any problem. So, don’t be the person whining about the crowded train… that’s NOT a problem! “It’s not what happens to you,” said the wise Epictetus, “but how you react to it that matters.” Say this to yourself…

[*I need to note that the Harv Eker makes it clear in this book that he does not mean to degrade poor people. He does not think that rich people are better than poor or middle-class people. They’re just richer.]

I Have A Millionaire Mind!

Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: Your Money Blueprint (Part 1 Summary)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by T. Harv Eker’s Secret of the Millionaire Mind: Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth (2005) series. One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Enjoy!

“You can have all the knowledge and skills in the world, but if your ‘blueprint’ isn’t set for success, you’re financially doomed” (Harv Eker)

Who are you? How do you think? What are your habits and traits? How confident are you in yourself? Do you truly feel that you deserve wealth? What are your abilities? Can you act when you’re not in the mood? The fact that your character, thinking, and your beliefs are a critical part of what determines the level of your success (remember, to be successful it is not necessary you have to be wealthy financially, but wealthy is one of the measurements of success). Whatever results you’re getting, be they rich or poor, good or bad, positive or negative, always remember that your outer world is simply a reflection of your inner world.

Harv Eker makes it clear that we live in a world of cause and effect. Basically, who you are [your inner world] determines what you get [your outer world]. So whatever the results you get in any area of life that you can control, it is a mere result of your character, thinking, and habits. Whether it is how much money you have in your bank account or how healthy you feel or how you look like – it is always a RESULT, a reflection of who you are. So in term of money, a lack of money is never, ever a problem. “A lack of money,” said Eker, “is merely a symptom of what is going on underneath.”

If you want to change your outer world, as the book suggests (a lack of money in that case), you first need to change your inner world or “what is going on underneath.” Eker gives a simple example, he recalled, “Back in my time as a student I used to suffer from tense neck and back muscles. Therefore I went to see a physiotherapist twice a week to have my muscles un-tensed. I always felt better afterward, but the muscles would tense again and again. It wasn’t until I changed my behavior (mainly different sitting positions, more sleep, magnesium supplements, and less stress) that my muscle tensions would weaken… My point is that if only you treat the symptoms, you’ll always fall back. So, if you had a lack of money and I gave you some, sooner or later you would end up again with a lack of money. The problem is not the symptom, it is us… It’s our thinking, our habits, the way we act.”

To effectively change your results, symptoms or your overall life [your outer world], you first need to change yourself, your character, thinking and what you do [your inner world]. “Your income can grow only to the extent you do!” What has all this to do with your money blueprint? Well, you’ll understand it in the next post.

[To read my review of this book, CLICK THE TITLE, Secrets of Millionaire Mind Review]

To Change Your Outer World, You Need to Change Your Inner World

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People #1 Be Proactive

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by late Stephen R. Covey, writer of the most-effective personal development book, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change (first published 1989). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Grow!

“Be Proactive is about taking responsibility for your life. You can't keep blaming everything on your parents or grandparents. Proactive people recognize that they are ‘response-able.’ They don't blame genetics, circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. They know they choose their behavior”
(Stephen R. Covey)

Covey categorizes people into two main groups: the ones that are proactive, and the ones that are reactive:

“Proactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Influence. They work on the things they can do something about. The nature of their energy is positive, enlarging and magnifying, causing their Circle of Influence to increase… Reactive people, on the other hand, focus their efforts in the Circle of Concern. They focus on the weakness of other people, the problems in the environment, and circumstances over which they have no control. Their focus results in blaming and accusing attitudes, reactive language, and increased feelings of victimization. The negative energy generated by that focus, combined with neglect in areas they could do something about, causes their Circle of Influence to shrink.”

So, every one of us has a circle of influence and a circle of concern that both share the same center in our personality. As we encounter each part of the problem, we are to choose on how to react to it. If it is something we can’t fix no matter what, we stop concerning about it and focus on the other parts that we can change.

For example, if we live in a society that is characterized by unemployment, reactive people do nothing at all and being passive to the reality. Proactive people focus on what they can do to improve themselves, create new jobs (or part-time) and be more competitive.

Effective People are Proactive People

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: To Change Effectively, Change Perceptions (Introduction)

This is a chapter-by-chapter summary of a book by late Stephen R. Covey, writer of the most-effective personal development book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change (first published 1989). One chapter, one article. Read this summary, buy the book. Grow!

“To change ourselves effectively, we first had to change our perceptions”

“In order to be effective, you have to focus on changing some important things in yourself”

(Stephen R. Covey)

According to Covey, the most importing thing we have to change in ourselves is not our behaviour, but our character and perceptions. Changing our behaviour, which is what most people tend to do when choosing to change themselves, has only brief results. To be effective, we must put an effort into changing the way we see the world around us (perceptions).

Another important thing to mention is that people see other successful people around them and tend to try to become like them in the most effortless and brief way possible. If we really want to achieve our goal we must not focus that much on how long will that take, but firstly focus to change from inside out to be able to attempt it. For example, you can’t really start building a house without building the foundations first.

That’s what The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People will teach you step by step. The first 3 habits emphasize on improving your skills to become independent. The next 3 are focused on taking advantage of teamwork development, interacting with people and become interdependent. The last one is about improving what you’ve already achieved and growing bigger and bigger.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People are:

To Change Effectively, First Change Your Perceptions!

Can A Marshmallow Predict Your Success?

It’s amazing what you can learn from the Internet and YouTube. The Stanford Marshmallow Experiment leads us to believe it can. In 1972 a psychologist called Walter Mischel conducted an experiment with around 600 pre-school children. Individually the children were led into a plain room, devoid of any distractions, that had their choice of treat (Oreo cookie, marshmallow or pretzel) on a table by a chair. They were told that they could eat the treat and ring the bell at any time (signifying they had eaten it) or wait until the researcher returned, at which point they would be rewarded with a second of their chosen treat. Watching the children wait is quite an experience. Some cover their eyes with their hands, others tug their pigtails, some stroked the treat, as if they were caring of it, and some even start kicking the desk, while some turn away from the temptation.

A third of the children could delay their gratification long enough to get a second treat. This is interesting, but what is even more interesting is the follow up study, which showed that the child who would wait 15 minutes had an SAT score that was, on average, 210 points higher than that of the child who could wait only 30 seconds.

Our ability to delay gratification or to exercise self-control has a correlation with achievement.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

Change Your Life: Say 'Yes' Only When Your Vision is Served (Don't Refrain from Saying 'No')

“A ‘no’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better than

a ‘yes’ merely uttered to please, or worse, to avoid trouble”
(Mahatma Gandhi)

‘No’ is one of the shortest words in the English language, and one of the easiest to pronounce – and yet it is one of the most difficult words for so many of us to utter. We often end up saying ‘yes’ because we want to please, because we don’t want to let others down, or because we fear that their disappointment will turn to anger, which will be directed toward us. We forget, however, that sometimes saying ‘yes’ to others is tantamount to saying ‘no’ to ourselves.

To become more joyful and more productive, we have to focus our sights on the vision that God gives to us. This implies learning to say ‘no’ more often – to people as well as opportunities (even though how good they are) – which is not easy. Sometime we have to say ‘no’ to lots of good things in order to say ‘yes’ to the best ones. It means prioritizing, choosing activities that we really want to be involved in, while letting go of others.

“’No’ is a complete sentence and so often we forget that. When we don't want to do something we can simply smile and say ‘no’. We don't have to explain ourselves, we can just say ‘No’. Early on my journey I found developing the ability to say ‘no’ expanded my ability to say ‘yes’ and really mean it. My early attempts at saying ‘no’ were often far from graceful but with practice even my ‘no’ came from a place of love. Love yourself enough to be able to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’” (Susan Gregg)

“Let today mark a new beginning for you. Give yourself permission to say ‘No’ without feeling guilty, mean, or selfish. Anybody who gets upset and/or expects you to say ‘Yes’ all of the time clearly doesn’t have your best interest at heart. Always remember: You have a right to say ‘No’ without having to explain yourself. Be at peace with your decisions” (Stephanie Lahart)

“Say ‘no’ to everything, so you can say ‘yes’ to the one thing” (Richie Norton)

Don’t refrain from saying ‘no’

Say ‘yes’ only when your vision is served

P.s: Sometime ‘no’ is the kindest word.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

Change Your Life: Appreciate and Learn from Those Around You

“Appreciation is to humans what the sun is for plants”

(Frank Iversen)

There are certain people – ones we know intimately and others we meet for the first time – who, for one reason or another, irritate us. It could be the way they act or talk, the way they look or walk. And while there is no need to always change our perspective about those people – leaving the scene or minimizing the time we spend with them could be the right thing to do – we lose many opportunities when we mindlessly succumb to the dictates of our unpleasant reactions.

Reflecting on the source of our dislike toward another person can reveal something about ourselves, because we often get annoyed by precisely those things we dislike in ourselves. Learning to appreciate things about the person who vexes us can help us cultivate the benefit-finder within, as well as develop deeper compassion – both of which will contribute to our relationships with others and with ourselves. What can you learn from others now?

Don’t allow others to upset you,

Appreciate and learn from those around you.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)

 References:

1. Choose the Life You Want: 101 Ways to Create You Own Road to Happiness by Tal Ben-Shahar, PhD (New York: The Experiment, 2012) Buy this book!

2. An Open Heart: Practicing Compassion in Everyday Life by Dalai Lama (New York: Back Bay Books, 2002).

How to Spark Your Creative Mind

“All human beings have the capacity to generate novel, original, clever, or ingenious products, solutions, and techniques. Creative human beings develop that capacity… Creative people take risks and frequently push the boundaries of their perceived limits” (Art Costa).

“A mind that is stretched to a new idea never returns to its original dimensions”
(Oliver Wendell Holmes).

Creativity can be hard to define. How do you describe the “Eureka!” moment when a person experiences a creative insight? Some researchers define creativity as combining existing elements in an innovative way that creates a new purpose (for example, motor + bicycle = motorcycle). Others see creativity as the art of generating novel ideas from taking a fresh look at how things are interrelated (for example, as Charles Cave writes, “…noting the regular diet of ladybugs inspired organic farmers to bring ladybugs in to consume crop-destroying aphids”).

Thinking about what is creative may call to mind images such as street buskers playing guitar and drummer banging out a complex rhythm at Waterfront Kuching or the designs for the Dewan Undangan Negeri (DUN) Sarawak building. Creativity, however, encompasses much more than music and art. Creativity gives rise to innovative ideas and products that bring changes both great and small.

Consider the following examples of creative innovations that have had an impact; Art Fry and Spence Silver invented the Post-it^TM in 1980, enabling people to save paper and protect documents by using removable notes; agricultural chemist George Washington Carver developed the revolutionary method of crop rotation – alternating soil-depleting crops with soil-enriching ones – allowing land to be used more efficiently; Jim Henson revolutionized children’s television and the way children learn about the world through his invention of the Muppets and development of Sesame Street (a TV program that I like very much when I was a kid); and more.

Creativity doesn’t just happen on these world-shifting levels. You too are a creative thinker. Every day you do some sort of creative works. Your everyday moments of creativity might include events similar to mine as following: Thinking of a new way to talk to co-worker about a problem, changing how I commute to office so that I can work or listen to audiobook while I’m in transit, and finding a unique way to write a blog topic that sets it apart from other articles posted in the internet (Okay, maybe not everyone doing these. But I hope you get what I mean). 

Learning how to heighten your creativity will boost your ability to think productively and successfully. Begin by thinking of creativity in three separate ways:

1) The characteristics of the creative person

2) The type of environment that fosters creativity

3) The stages of the creative process

As you work toward any creative outcome – a novel solution, idea, approach, tangible product, work of art, system, or program – focus on these three elements to maximize your creative abilities. I will post each how-to boost your creative thinking in following post article. Stay updated.

Lord, Give Us Today Our Daily Idea(s)